The continuous references to self-sabotage and self-harm (even if, thankfully, minor) in Blaine’s storyline are both heartbreaking and so, so painfully relatable.
I also love to see him struggling so much with self worth. While Kurt knows his value as an individual, Blaine seems to solely rely on other people’s perception when it comes to it. When he feels like he is not useful to someone anymore, he completely freaks out. Not healthy, honey pie. Not healthy. Kurt is not with you because you can give him something or because he needs you in a selfish kind of way. Kurt is with you because he loves you and expects nothing but to be loved back.
He also has the very peculiar habit of thinking he’s shit and - unconsciously or consciously - doing things to prove his point further and relish in the feeling of being right. I share this trait with him and I know SO well how it feels.
He thinks he failed his relationship with Kurt = sleeps with another guy and screws everything up. He feels Kurt doesn’t find him attractive anymore = completely stops taking care of his body. Not good enough for Nyada? Well shit that’s just perfect because I’ve always wanted to be a doctor.
I love you and your countless issues, Blainers. You are incredible to watch and I just want to see you overcome all the walls you have built in your mind.
I also wonder who made you feel like your worth was only determined by your achievements/other people’s opinion…